In the days immediately following your breakup, all you can think about is how to get your ex back.. If you’re like most people in this situation you’re ready to make all kinds of promises, beg, cry, and plead for one more chance. You believe your love is the kind they right stories about and you are willing to do whatever it takes to save your relationship and get the happy ending you thought was due this time around.

That’s the way it should be – to some extent. You should believe your love is one that’s WORTH fighting for. If love wasn’t such a strong emotion there wouldn’t be so many books, movies, plays, songs, and tall tales about it. It’s the best thing in the world when it’s going right and one of the worst when it goes wrong. It can be devastating to endure an unwanted breakup.

When you’re desperate to get your ex back, it feels like an emergency that must be dealt with immediately. Your heart is screaming ‘Now, now, now!’ in the booming voice of the biggest, baddest drill sergeant the military has ever seen. It’s tempting to let that overriding sense of urgency overtake your own sanity and completely drown out the simple small whisper of reason in the back of your mindGet Your Ex Back that’s telling you ‘perhaps it would be better to wait’.

So, how do you override the panic-driven drill sergeant in your heart and take things slow so you can have greater success in your efforts to get your ex back?

Start Small Instead of Going Big

Most people, at a time like this, go all in when trying to win the affections of the one who got away. It’s understandable. Sometimes it’s a big fight that signals the end and you feel that it will take a big ‘show of intent’ in order to get back together. But, these large gestures only serve to mount the pressure.

Skip the five course four-star dinner with candles and violins. That’s a lot of pressure and quite a few opportunities for your date to feel overwhelmed and hit his or her personal emotional panic button in search of escape from the situation. More importantly, asking your ex to commit to a dinner such as this is much more likely to get a negative answer.

However, asking your ex to meet you for a cup of coffee or perhaps even dessert is much more likely to get a favorable response. If things go well, you can order a second cup and linger for a while. More importantly, you can plan for another date that might pick up the intensity a bit.

If things are stilted or awkward between you, your date will have a perfect retreat because there hasn’t been a huge outflow of cash or expectation of time commitment as a result.

Why is this so important? Because it lets your ex know you’re thinking about his or her comfort. It sends a message that you want to work things out between you but that you also want to make sure your ex is comfortable with the idea as well. Now, if you really want to know how to make the most of your second, first date, be sure to watch this FREE video designed to help you get more out of your efforts to get your ex back.

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